Things are not always what they seem

Well, I received a very nice, very open email in return regarding my questions to our potentially new pastor about women in ministry.

Proceeding with caution.

And...I may have spoken too soon

Yesterday my post indicated that my husband and I had found a church and were ready to commit (and submit) to New Life Church. Fortunately, my husband picked up some literature from the information desk on their leadership theology and practice. As I read the Pastor's position paper on the Elder Ministry, my heart sank. It appears (and I am still waiting for an answer from the pastor clarifying his position) that this is a male-driven, patriarchal leadership church structure. Sigh.

Many questions have surfaced in light of this revelation.

"Why can't we find good, solid Bible preaching AND an egalitarian view of leadership?"

"Is it because egalitarianism is UNbiblical?"

"If so, then why did you call me to ministry God?"

"Why does it matter what they believe about women in ministry? Can't I just attend and keep my mouth shut?"

And then I think,
I was happy being "just a" wife and mom. I could just stay home, read my Bible like a good girl, cook nice meals, go to lunch with friends, support my husband, post inspiring blogs and Facebook status updates. I could do that...

No. No, I could not.

I cannot ignore the call of God on my life to teach and preach to whoever and wherever He gives me opportunity.

I cannot ignore my responsibility to the next generation to be a role model of a woman who fears the Lord.

I cannot ignore the fire in my bones.

I cannot ignore injustice.

God help me, I must study, speak, lead - not because I want to, but because He called me.

It's difficult to ignore the voices of those who say I am not qualified. It is impossible to ignore God's voice.