C-C-C-C-Courage!

My life is about to take a dramatic (for me) turn in a new direction. After 22 years on staff and a lifetime of attendance, I'm about to leave my home church and embark on a new season. Last fall my husband took a teaching job that requires an hour drive each way. We wanted to give it a while to settle in to see if this might require a move on our part and so, as the school year is winding down - and the daily drive seems longer with every passing day - we have made the decision to move. Lots of people move. But not us. We are the Rock people. We are Giant Oaks with deep roots.

I've felt this stirring, this shifting, this moving in my spirit for several years now. It was only the job and the drive that motivated my husband however. He just couldn't see any logical reason to leave. Now we have one. Now the door is open. If we do not walk through it now, we never will.

I thought that was my greatest fear - to live and die in the same small town, to never experience life outside Lewis County. I've yearned for a move, prayed for it, actually begged God for it, and now it's here and I'm terrified. But not in the way you'd expect.

I'm excited at the prospect of a new church and making new friends. I've wondered what it would be like to walk into a church, into a community where I have no history. Will people like me? Will I fit? Will I have an opportunity to blossom and grow? Or, will people shut me out, and be threatened by the presence of a new-comer? These are the things I've heard over the years from people who have moved into our little town and into our church. Some, like me have come from a place of authority and position - a place where they were the go-to girl. They have complained - sometimes bitterly - that they can't break into the "clique" - that no one will let them do what they were called to do.

One of the things I don't understand about this move is that while my husband has a job, I have nothing. No new ministry position to step into. I feel that I am just beginning to peak in knowledge, skill and wisdom. I know the call of God is still on my life, yet I am stepping into the black hole called "transition." The very word implies a move into something new - a new direction, position or ministry. I'm afraid that I will get as stuck in the "transition" phase of my life as I have been in this last, long season. I'm afraid I never will actually "transition." I feel exposed and vulnerable.

I'm also afraid that I'm making a mistake. I'm afraid I'll end up like Violet Biggs in It's a Wonderful Life. I'm afraid I'll come slinking sheepishly back to Chehalis. "Silly me. What was I thinking? This is home."

I think that's why the word COURAGE has become my new favorite word. I'm not naturally a courageous person. I'm not a risk taker. But I believe God has opened this door and I'm going to swallow my fear and walk through it. I'm speaking Joshua 1:9 out loud over my life:
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” 

Because He is with me, I will not fear.

One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”(Matthew 22:35-40)

Scot McKnight calls this, The Jesus Creed.
Creed is defined:

1. A formal statement of religious belief; a confession of faith.

2. A system of belief, principles, or opinions.

We Christians are so good at fooling ourselves into thinking that we are living The Jesus Creed. After all - we do love the Lord. We sing it and we say it, but I submit that we - none of us - are very good at living it.

We could do it if it wasn't for that pesky little phrase Jesus added at the end - the part about loving your neighbor. See, John the Apostle clarified it for us. He says if you don't do the latter, you are never able to do the former.

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.  

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as
an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. (1 John 4:7-10)

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.1 Peter 3:7-9

So I ask along with the religious rulers of the day, "Who is my neighbor?" Nope.  On second thought, I'm not really asking the "who" question. I think Jesus explained that pretty well. I want to know how - not who. I want to know what - not who. I want to know when - not who.
How do I love when I just plain don't feel like it - when my neighbor is not a "despised Samaritan", but someone that I am ambivalent towards? Maybe ambivalence is hatred after all.
What does that love really look like in practical terms? Mostly it seems like it looks like TIME. Oh. I hoard my time like a miser hoards pennies.
When does love step in and when does it stand back? Sometimes love propels me right into the middle of something I'd rather stay out of. I have valued safety and security above sacrificial love.

Father - help me love sacrificially, courageously, boldly, no holding back, no more excuses. Help me live The Jesus Creed.