For The Mothers

For some reason this morning I'm feeling the weight of the tragedy that occured in our community this week. A young, talented, likeable 19 year old man was tragically killed in a car accident. Whenever these kinds of things happen in a small community like ours, the ripples (more like shock-waves) are felt through the whole community, whether you were aquainted with the family involved or not. In this case, I did know the family - though not well.

My association with the Cox family came through Little League baseball. For one brief season our families spent a lot of time together. The boys not only played on the same team during the regular season, but went on to the State Tournament in All Stars. Little League is a pretty accurate picture of parenting - good and bad. Parents that never come to games. Parents that come drunk. Parents that scream at the umpires, coaches and kids. I tell you - people's true colors come out down at Stan Hedwall park... Then there are the parents that teach their kids to win and lose well - who spend countless hours sitting on bleachers in the wind and rain and occasional sun - who run the concession stand and serve on the board and groom the fields. This was the Cox family.

I guess my sadness this morning stems from my memories of Tracy Cox. I watched her for years absolutely pour herself into her three boys. I can only imagine the ragged, gaping hole that has been torn in her heart. That suffocating, "I can't breath" kind of pain. I don't want to put myself in her shoes, but somehow I can. It's something no parent EVER wants to experience and most of us go through life thinking that we won't.

I'm thinking of all the times my boys or my daughter have left the house to the sound of my nagging and griping about a hundred insignificant things. About the times that I've overreacted, lashed out in anger and frustration. Not said the life-giving, affirming things they needed to hear.

So today, I'm going to tell them how much I love them. How thankful I am that God allowed me to be their mom. How proud I am - not just for their many accomplishments, but for the fantastic people they have become.

This life on earth is so short. Live fully today.

Lord, teach us to pray

One of my favorite movies is Frank Capra's "You Can't Take It With You", starring Jimmy Stewart and Lionel Barrymore. It's a silly, touching little movie starring many of the same characters as in my all-time favorite, "It's a Wonderful Life". Twice in the movie, as the family is gathered around the dinner table, "Grandpa" prays a prayer that starts with, "Well Sir, here we are again…" and ends with "….and as far as anything else is concerned, we leave that up to You. Amen." I actually think this is an amazing way to begin and end a time of prayer. Simple. To the point. Without pretense or presumption.

Jesus taught His disciples to pray in such a bold, straightforward, simple way – we've been trying to complicate it ever since. Here is Jesus instruction on prayer: Matthew 6:5-15

"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

"This, then, is how you should pray:
" 'Our Father in heaven,
hallowed be your name,
your kingdom come,
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us today our daily bread.
Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

First the assumption is that you WILL pray. Three times in this passage Jesus says, "when you pray". Second, remember who needs to hear your prayer. Not the people at your church, not your family, not your small group. Certainly corporate prayer can be an encouragement and a faith-builder, but the only person who really needs to hear your prayer is the Father. Third, prayers don't need to be long. Here's a rule of thumb; never ask a preacher to pray. They will take that opportunity to pray an entire sermon. I also don't think you need to yell when you pray. I've heard the excuse that people just get "passionate" when they pray. I want to ask them if they think God is deaf… I certainly don't like being yelled at. I doubt that God likes it either.

This then is how you should pray..

Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name… Father, You are holy, worthy, awesome, great, righteous, honored, revered. I bow at the mention of Your name.

your kingdom come,
your will be done
on earth as it is in heaven. I like how John Ortberg paraphrases it, "Let up there come down here."

Give us today our daily bread. This is the one that gets me. Recently someone gave me a list of "declarations" to be made in prayer. They included the following:

1. Jobs and better jobs.

2. Raises and bonuses

3. Benefits

4. Sales and commissions

5. Favorable settlements

6. Estates and inheritances (not the death of relatives) I didn't add that – no lie.

7. Interest and income

8. Rebates and returns

9. Checks in the mail

10. Gifts and surprises

11. Finding money

12. Debts paid off

13. Expenses decreased

14. Blessing and increase.

Someone please tell me how these things line up with "Give us today our daily bread."? It's even worse if you look at it in light of the rest of Matthew 6 where Jesus says to not to store up treasures on earth, to trust the Father to give you everything you need for each day whether it be food or clothes. He said you can't have two masters. It's either God or money. How do you think the God who said "You shall have no other gods before me" feels about these kinds of "declarations"? My rule of thumb is that if the starving Christians in Darfur can't pray it, I can't either. It's not that any of these things are wrong in and of themselves. But "declaring" them is just unsettling to me. The focus seems to be on the wrong thing. John Calvin put it this way, "The evil in our desire typically does not lie in what we want, but that we want it too much."

Forgive us our debts,
as we also have forgiven our debtors.
And lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins."

Forgiveness. It just occurred to me re-reading this tonight that, "And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one." is tucked right in this section about forgiveness. Satan wants nothing more than for us to not fully appropriate the forgiveness offered by our Father, and to withhold that same forgiveness from those who have sinned against us. Wow, that's thought provoking stuff.

Matthew 6 ends like this:

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Simple. Seek Him and His righteousness. "Well Sir, here we are again….as to anything else, we leave that up to You." Well said Grandpa. Well said.